Tuesday, March 29, 2011

The Official Language

1. For your information, please. (FYI) 
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it. 

2. Noted and returned. 
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it little while. 

3. Review and comment. 
Meaning: Do the dirty work so that I can forward it. 

4. Action please. 
Meaning: Get yourself involved for me. Don't worry, I'll claim the credit. 

5. For your necessary action. 
Meaning: It's your headache now. 

6. Copy to. 
Meaning: Here's a share of my headache. 

7. For your approval, please. 
Meaning: Put your neck on the chopping board for me please. 

8. Action is being taken. 
Meaning: Your correspondence is lost and I am trying to locate it. 

9. Your letter is receiving our attention. 
Meaning: I am trying to figure out what you want. 

10. Please discuss. 
Meaning: I don't know what the hell this is, so please brief me. 

11. For your immediate action. 
Meaning: Do it NOW! Or I will get into serious trouble. 

12. Please reply soon. 
Meaning: Please be efficient. It makes me look inefficient. 

13. We are investigating/ processing your request with the relevant authorities. 
Meaning: They are causing the delay, not us. 

14. Regards. 
Meaning: Thanks and bless you for reading all the crap.

Little Knowledge is a Funny Thing

A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

ICC Cricket World Cup : India beats Australia : Photos say it all

Seeking The blessings of the GOD....

Let's beat up the competition :


Friday, March 25, 2011

Why Australia is better in sports than India

Everybody has been wondering why Australia
is better in sports compared to India ?

After Analysis and research, it was found the
root cause was .... "The motivation factor" -
missing in Indians........

Monday, March 14, 2011

Benefits of Tea

Doctor: "What  happened?"     

Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do.  Every time my husband comes   home drunk he beats me to a  pulp."   

Doctor: "I have a real good medicine for  that. When your husband comes    home drunk, just  take a  glass of sweet tea and start swishing it in your mouth.    Just swish and swish but don't swallow until he goes to bed and  is asleep."     

Two weeks later, the woman comes back to  the doctor looking fresh and   reborn.          

Woman: "Doctor, that was a brilliant  idea! Every time my husband came   home drunk, I swished  with sweet tea. I swished and swished, and he   didn't  touch me!"      

Doctor: "You see how much keeping your  mouth shut helps?

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Psycho : The Rapist

A blonde went to a book store & said : " I want the book named :


The bookseller searched his entire store, came back after 6 hours... completely exhausted & desperate.

She gave her a tight slap & said : 

"You idiot !!!  The book is named ' PSYCHOTHERAPIST. ' "

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Success is like.....

Success is like fart....

It's tolerable only when it's your own !!!

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Why People Marry ???

Q : Why do people marry in life ?

A : So that after death, if they get heaven, they'll feel better.
and if they get hell, it will feel like home !!!


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Santa Singh ka Operation

Santa (beewi se) : agar operation ke dauraan meri maut ho gayi to tum isi doctor se shaadi kar lena.

beewi : aisa kyon bol rahe ho...

Santa : toh kya us kameene doctor ko maaf kar du ????